Driving in my car this morning I had a moment that helped me remember exactly who I am, a moment that, in its simplicity, showed a portion of who I am as a whole person. I think there are moments in our lives that truly reveal a little about us. Most of these moments go completely unnoticed until we allow ourselves to evaluate what we do on a daily basis, or allow other to lift up the good and bring to light the bad.
I am a believer that God calls us to take these moments and to use them to make ourselves better. The only way to become more Christ like is to examine ourselves in these moments that define us. I have taken some time to evaluate my moments, and to be honest some of them have scared me. Some are because I haven’t realized the bigger picture and others because in that moment I realize the uniqueness of my life. I have decided these are the moments that will define ME, and that is the scariest thing of all.
When I started to evaluate my moments the first one that came to mind happened extremely recently, A moment were a youth, who has no idea her impact, made my slap myself in the face. As a faith community we were attempting to talk our way through a conflict situation. Asking the tough questions like how do we change the hearts of those who hurt us? How do we make them more loving people? How to we let them know that they are hurting us? When this youth person said, why don’t we start by not tearing them down behind their backs! Like a brick to the head I almost fell over! She was absolutely right, and even I was looking at the problem the wrong way. How do we change the hearts of THOSE… How do we make THEM … How do we let the THEM!!! She made me realize I have to change my heart to change the hearts around me. If we want people to become more loving we have to be able to LOVE first, and loving someone who hurting you is the greatest charge Christ has ever given us. (At this point I want to thank that young woman for opening my heart and my eyes. Thank YOU) I realized this moment is one that will make me someone who focuses on my heart, to love, forgive, and encourage the change in others hearts. It makes me think of the TV show Heroes. Save the Cheerleader, save the world…. Change your heart, change the world!
The other moment that came to mind, was when I was driving in my car on the way to work. Now you have to picture a silver Pontiac Vibe, a long haired large man wearing Aviator sun glasses on in a dress business shirt, bobbing his head as if to some rap song with a strong beat. At least that is what I believe the woman in the car next to me saw when we caught eyes under the Santa Fe overpass. When we caught eyes, she had already had her window down, and i believe she thought we were listening to the same radio station, because when I rolled my window down BLASTING Baby by the BieBs I have never seen a woman laugh so hard and spit coffee all over her dashboard before in my life. Because nothing says Pop Sensation Justin Bieber like a 25 year old professional business man in a Pontiac vibe! I don’t think she stopped laugh until we his Broadway almost a mile away. Long story short, I will always be completely awkward and unpredictable, and I am so glad God has blest me with the Unique style because if he didn’t I might be too boring for my own good.
Finally, this moment that truly sits in my heart like a rock. It was a cool New Years Eve evening. It was a long day of snowboarding at Monarch with at least 13 inches of fresh powder. I was laying tracks like Dr. Dre lays beats and it was a perfect day to snowboard. My Girlfriend (at the time) had the worst day of riding in her entire life. Her board wouldn’t slide she was stuck on the mountain, she fell more than usual and ended up spending half the day at the bottom drinking hot coco alone because I had no idea where she was. (This isn’t to speak against me not wanting to be with her, I just ride a little harder/faster and so we know we spend time on the hill apart and that is ok.) So when we do meet up at the end of the day she is frustrated and I am exhausted but we head back to a beautiful place called Rainbow Trail Lutheran Camp to celebrate new year’s with some of the staff from the previous summer. Right around sunset we are sitting on the porch of and I am about to do something that would change my life forever when one of the staff named Eric comes out and sits with us on the porch. No I have to remind you this girl and I are sitting on the most romantic spot I know, at sunset, and I am about to do something that will change my life… AND SOMEONE IS WITH US! So every time a car pulls up the road I tell Eric, hey man you should go see who that is… trying to shew him away as nicely as possible. Luckily for me, he thought I was just being a Jerk and decided to leave. After a few moments I stand, turn around and look at this amazing young woman. She looks up at me and ask “Oh, Are we Done?” and I responded “God I hope not.” I then got down on one knee and asked Kelly Anne Fritz to marry me. I realize that moment forever I would be that more than just myself, I would forever be and US. Thank God for the US!!!
On your points about self reflection, too many people try to force others into seeing their point of view. They direct an enormous amount of energy outward to twist and conform others like a piece of clay. I have always thought that one must direct that energy inward as you suggest. In my readings of MLK, his greatest strength was his inner peace with God. His confidence and leadership came from that. That's how to reach people. Not by yelling at them or threatening them. But by one's actions. One's presence. How one conducts themselves.
ReplyDeleteI met Bruce Cockburn a few years back at one of his concerts and he has those qualities. He has a sense of inner well being that resonates outward towards others. It clearly flows into his music and his playing.
As Van Morrison once sang:
Spiritual hunger, spiritual thirst, but you have to change it on the inside first. To be satisfied".
Mahalo,
Steve